Sun Rise, Bunker del Carmel Barcelona

I am in need of guidance. While compulsively snapshotting the amazing view of Barcelona, I took a moment to sit quietly, look out and pray. I need something bigger than me to give me the answers. I hope that I find what I am looking for soon.

 

Fat Girl Back in Korea.

I’ve set up shop, once again, in South Korea. I landed a few days ago and am still jet lagged but extremely grateful for my experience at home as well as feeling super optimistic about the year ahead.

I am back in my old time, Icheon. This is where I grew into the person I am today. Admittedly, it started off on a rough note at the beginning of 2012, but half a year later – I’d experienced a whole lot more of life and with some deep introspection and love for myself, I turned the experience into one of the best of my life. I am happy to be here. It is a small town with some beautiful parks. I have the most amazing apartment and my school seems nice.

I arrived back in Korea 5/6kg lighter than when I left 3 months ago. The airplane seatbelt felt looser and that was great. For the first time since 2012, I am not basing my emotions on my weight and my eating. I am feeling confident and happy in my skin and of course, would love to eat better and continue to lose weight. It’s been so freeing to deal with life without the added hatred of my body.

My visit home made me so much stronger. I really engulfed the value of family and the friends that I know will be with me for life. I was in my place, I had my people and I was surrounded by beauty. Before leaving South Africa, I took a walk on the beach alone after having a final breakfast with my mom. I said a prayer out loud, because there was no one around. I thanked the Lord for my wonderful experience at home and asked him to bless me during my upcoming year back in Korea. I asked Him to make me more aware of the beauty in Korea, even though it is a different kind of beauty to South Africa. The truth is, there is beauty anywhere – it’s just how you perceive it. My closing thoughts were that – coming back to Korea was MY choice. Even though I was utterly bleak to return, I knew that it was what I chose to do.

I think the Lord will bless me this year coupled with the fact that I need to stay positive and see the best in the world.