Something I Am Without

I don’t have enough power within me to

Exhale the smoke from my mouth.

This is what you

Do to me.

And the chaotic busyness

In my stomach is

Painful.

 

It’s the feeling of something or

Someone

Digging their way down deeper and

Deeper.

Awkwardly trying to get to the

Pit.

Where I feel just as

Empty as a vase full of

Dying flowers,

Desperately trying to

Suck in water that would give it

Life.

I am

Without.

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I Have To Go, Good Night.

Unlike before, when the lights mimicked me, my head feels the pillow and I’m in darkness. Only the sound of my breath, heartbeat and the trees blowing in the wind. That incessant beating that is n sync with my throbbing head usually makes me sick but today, it makes me believe in you. I am alone. If I could store these words in the spaces of my head, I would. I can’t. And now they’re lost as this shining light is burning my retina. I have to go, good night.