If you think about death…I mean, really think about it, you realise that you are, more likely than not, going to reach a point in your life where you are going to suffer. Most likely, it’ll be a physical pain that you’ve never experienced before, and you’re going to struggle. It’s going to hurt. And that pain could go on for hours and hours, or days. You don’t know the fate that life has in store for you. Does that scare you?
We’re born alone, right? Why is it that we strive to have a significant other? We live our lives being ashamed of being single and putting up with the biggest load of bullshit from the opposite (or same) sex.
I thought to myself “I hate that I have to reply to e-mails, I hate that I am asked to do things, I hate that I have to worry about whether I have enough food in my fridge and that I have to go to the shops. I hate that I have to get up and go to work.” I want to go home to my country but lately, I don’t want to go home. And then it just hit me, that I am so sick of living.
My mother emailed me a few days ago to tell me that my sister-in-laws mother was very sick and could not get out of bed. For as long as I have known her, she has always been obese. It has been difficult for her to move around and if I am correct, I don’t think she has been able to leave her house for quite some time. I’m currently on vacation from work and so I hadn’t e-mailed my mom back yet. However, I got another e-mail from her today that said that my sister-in-laws mother has died.
Someone I know passed away today. My friend called me in tears, telling me the news. I didn’t know him well, but it really sparked an emotion within me. I have been fortunate to not have anyone close to me die, but it still shatters me to hear something like this.