Sitting at my newly assembled desk from Amazon, that an ex helped me build two days ago (I say helped, I didn’t really do much at all) listening to my “writing music”. The music I used to put on and listen to through my headphones in Korea when the world seemed like a chaotic mess of people talking a language I didn’t understand. Somehow, it annoyed me. I hated hearing the different intonations. I hated that I understood some of it and for that reason, couldn’t block it out but instead trying to configure what they were saying all of the time. I though the world would be much better surrounded by a language you did understand.
After almost three weeks, I am finally in a place that I can call ‘home’ … until July 6th.
I moved to England on June, 1st and it’s been one hell of a rollercoaster. It’s the hardest career/life move that I have ever had to do. Some might argue how that could possibly be – in Korea, everything is handed to you. Yes, you don’t understand the language or the culture but you arrive there with a job and an apartment (that your school pays for) and you earn a cushy salary.
Long story short – I was tired of being unhappy and letting everyone else dictate to me how I should feel and how to be treated so I decided to up and leave. One month prior to my new work contract, I told my work I couldn’t stay on.
I’m currently sitting on top of a mountain in a forest, alone. I should of been long gone from here but, as you imagine, I’m way too unfit to make the rest of the journey – and that’s fine. Continue reading “Buddhist Temple Stay”
My life feels empty. This place leaves me feeling like an apathetic body in a dark hole. It doesn’t matter how many anti depressants I take or how many times I change my medication, I think this place will leave me feeling this way no matter what.
“Hi! One word then, one smile, is enough.” – a book-end I bought in South Korea. Simple, but isn’t it true?
It was Wednesday evening and I was at home. It had been raining all day, my favourite kind of weather, so I went onto my balcony wearing a sleeveless, short and almost see-through nighty without a bra so that I could breathe in the cool air for a minute.
Wow, my writing has slowed down considerably. It’s another one of those things where I get really excited about a project (writing my book) and then slowly lose interest or drive. I still have the aspiration to continue writing it but it’s barely in motion right now.